Clarity

Lately, after experiencing quite a few transnational issues with numerous of my "Temporary boyfriends", I think it is time to address those unpleasant matters once and for all.

Everyone who has seen me knows I have a very unique approach to my business, and I offer a very specialised and personalised experience.

I am very cautious in my choice of new "TB"s (Temporary boyfriends) and when the right connection is not present, I make it obvious enough so that further explanations of termination of the "relationship" are unnecessary. All people I see on a regular basis, I believe are special and amazing, they all bring something completely unique to my life and I appreciate every and each of them very much. Having wonderfully spent time is what I aim to deliver as well as experience myself.

I connect to everyone on a very personal level as I believe they do with me, and what I feel or say at those moments we spent together is always sincere and real. I am a very caring and understanding person, and good at reading the needs and wants of others. It gives me great joy of bringing a bit of happiness and pleasure to someone's life. Earning my living through doing that is not always an easy task, but it is always a lovely discovery of my own character and patience, and a great way to give the world some much needed love.

I have made many exceptions for everyone I hold dear, almost every TB at some point has overstayed an appointment without compensation, received a small gift on a special occasion or enjoyed some other benefit just for being on my "Favourite list".

I am accommodating, flexible and comprehensive and believe I work extremely hard in delivering everything that is expected of me and more. I fully understand that this business, non like any other, deals with much intimate matters and emotions, but nevertheless it is a business. This is how I feed my kid and pay my rent. People hire me to give them what they need, and they continuously see me because I do it well. I see people for exactly the same reason, thus we both give what the other is lacking and receive what we are lacking. It's a clear and simple exchange, no complications and unwanted emotions.

Lately however few of you, for whatever reason, have forgotten that, which resulted in awkward and unpleasant situations, termination of my services and bitter disappointments. Even though every situation was very individual and different from the other they've all collectively told me the same thing- I am either doing something wrong in the way I operate my business or I am doing it far too well.

What I do not understand is why everyone is so willingly receiving everything on offer and more, but so unwillingly giving their part of the deal. Why do I have to stick to the deal ie see you at the date and time requested by you at the privacy and comfort of my home or your hotel, restaurant or event, be as extravagant or as simple as you request me to be, be entertaining, happy and amusing, make you feel good, give you pleasure, keep everything at discretion, never invade your privacy etc., but at the same time your part of the deal (rewarding me with what I deserve for my wonderful services) is ok to be dishonoured?

If you become close friends with the owner of a car dealership would you still pay for the car you order from his shop?

Why are the boundary lines so easily blurred? Should I treat you as a stranger and be cold in order for you to remember that I am your paid companion? Should I be mechanical in the execution of our transaction so that reminds you it is after all a transaction? Why am I punished for doing my job well?

And if you all care about me ( as you say you do), why can't you understand that I am not doing this business to make friends ( even though it happens). If I didn't need your rewards I would not be in this profession, thus you would've never met me. It is the brutal reality and if you can not except it, please move on without insulting me and putting me in awkward situations. If you can not afford my services, please don't contact me. Don't ask me to date you or join you for rendezvous outside the business etiquette. When I make an exception (special price or an extra hour) for you, don't make assumptions, I do not wish to see you outside our business arrangement, I value you too much and I would like to show it through doing small gestures for you.

You want to see me as a friend, but what you really mean is you want to see me on exactly the same terms as now but without Me receiving any benefits.

I don't remember you inviting me for dinner at your house or your birthday party...isn't that what friends do?

The four (married) gentlemen who I am referring to in this blog know who they are, and I want to tell them that I do not retain any hard feelings towards them, but I still feel disappointed by their behaviour, excuses and unreasonable assumptions.

Gentlemen,

I do not recall ever advertising my services on a dating site or "make new friends" site.

When you came looking for me I was a service provider and I still am. A very good one I believe.

I have never popped into your office or called your house just because we have become friendlier with each other. I have never overstepped your boundaries. I've always met you looking immaculate, treated you with respect and never diverged from delivering what was expected of me. I never promised you anything, and if you have really respected me back I wouldn't have to write this blog.

Instead you have made me bagging for my rewards, feeling uncomfortable and sent me messages that are absolutely unreasonable and presumptuous.

"We always have such a great time, I thought you would enjoy going away with me without the business obligations....."

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"Personally, I don't think it is sustainable (or right) for me, for my own state of mind and self esteem to pay for a relationship with someone, because at the end of the day, that is what it is. If I just wanted 'sex' then I could get that much more easily ....."

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"I had thought that we were close enough so that I could invite you as a friend to enjoy the*****************************************with me - outwith the financial commitments....."

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"I miss you a lot and really wanted to spend more time with you. I thought you feel the same and assumed financial rewards would not be a part of that equation....."

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Never have I ever made promises or even suggestions that I am more than just your paid companion. I do value, every and each of you, very much and I truly am your friend and honestly love your company and personalities, but this should be counted as a fantastic unexpected bonus and not as a free ride.

If I wanted a real life date I would not be looking for one in between my married escort clientele. Hope that clarifies the air.

I wish all of you the best that the world has to offer, peace in your hearts and smiles on your faces.

Nicole xxx