AHA-2020
Freedom - 'the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants'.
As human beings living in the Western world we are considered free, yet as individuals we are tirelessly seeking freedom. If we are made to believe that we fundamentally have freedom, but still feel a vital need for it, then is there really such thing as freedom?
That was one of the many questions emerging in my mind as I was hearing myself blurting -Freedom, when asked what is that I want for 2020.
To be free to do something, I must be free not to do it, but how often is that actual formula successfully applied to my live?
Even though I hold freedom so near and dear to my heart, so much so, that I am ready to fight wars (personal) on its behalf, much of that freedom I cherish have already been decided for me. One can argue that every individual has a freedom of choice, but how can I have a freedom of choice when there are limitations to it? Limited choices are not truly free, are they?... that's why they are called limited.
I choose to live in a society free of bigotry, sexism and racism, yet I am stack in one that's defined by it. I choose to live in a world free of religious doctrines that inflict so much pain and suffering, yet I am a prisoner in a world that's led by it. I choose educational institutions to be child(human)-friendly and happy places of inspiration and growth, yet the suicides within the school communities, mental illnesses and disinterest in education within the youth are rising on a daily basis world wide. I choose to live in capitalism, where capital is taxed higher then labour, yet I have little say in it. Seems like it's not up to me as an individual if I deserve freedom, should have freedom, how much of it, what kind and when, yet, I have so much freedom in my life which I do not want to take for granted. Freedom to express my opinion, freedom to work and study, to love, to be in-charge of my own body, freedom to nourish myself, to think on my own etc. Which leads me to another question- if I have so much freedom already, is it just human greed that makes me battle with that subject?
That endless quest for wanting more that is all-consuming and often reduces life in all its richness and complexity to nothing but existence. What am I actually seeking freedom from? Is it perhaps, my greed, my ego, my attachments...my own desires?
But how can I let go of my desires?...they motivate me. My physical desire as hunger and thirst; intellectual desire as curiosity; sexual desire as lust; economic desire as success. Remove all these expressions of my desires and my life as I know it would cease to exist!
Wow! Did I just experienced an AHA moment, realising that the freedom I am seeking is actually FROM life as I know it?
The freedom from strong identities, that often turn me into unpleasant opposition. The freedom from my own, most times, silly desires that serve me with sleepless nights.The freedom from all I know, that keeps me in stagnation. The freedom from a certain personality I've attached to myself before I've even reached the age of reason. The freedom from my beliefs, that keep me as beautiful boat tight to the shore. The freedom from prejudice, installed by the same social circles, I so distaste. The freedom to embrace the unknown and unaccepted. The freedom of that cowardly human-centric idea that we are somewhat more special then any other living -breathing thing on that planet. What a beautiful moment it is to realise that the freedom to Be is all the freedom I actually need and want!
Happy New Year my Lovelies! Be free and free yourself to Be..... and don't forget to smile!
Nicole xxx
